This is my aunt Natasha.
She's my mommy's sister.
She came all the way from another country called Canada to visit me. She is the most beautiful Canadian I've ever seen. She is such a genuine person that her eyes sparkle. I sleep in my parents bed right now and I've heard lots of their private conversations and mommy always tells daddy that she loves Natasha so much because she is a wonderful and kind human being. I'm a human being too. I know this because my daddy is always saying, "You're a little human being!"
We drove Aunt Natasha, Uncle Brant and my cousin Lola to the airport today because they're going back to Canada. My mom was happy because she got to take the rented minivan back. "It's too fuckin' big!" mommy kept saying, "Sure it's nice to have the doors open automatically, and there's all that space for the strollers and the dogs but it also took what's left of my sexuality and put in a polyester pant suit." I'm not sure what that means except I know mommy felt middle aged driving that Caravan around. Anyway, mommy was also sad and was talking to herself on the way home saying, "Why does Natasha have to live so far away!" So I decided to have a melt down so mommy would stop feeling sorry for herself and deal with me. It worked.
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